Strength, a concept often discussed, yet its essence remains elusive.  Periodically reassessing our notions of strength proves invaluable.  It’s an opportunity to land & settle in our own wisdom.  So let’s take a moment to delve deeper now. Grab a pencil or open your notes app, and ponder without editing: what is strength to you? Next, think of someone you admire for their strength, irrespective of physical attributes. What actions of theirs exemplify true strength? Jot down any initial thoughts.

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Whose voice is shining through in your definition of strength?  Is this a voice that aligns with your current core values?  Perhaps it’s more of an unconscious, societal, or unrealistic notion that’s oozing out here?  That’s totally normal, and simply illustrates that your definition of strength might be in need of a little refinement!

Questions about the truth of strength haunted me when I was facing difficulties walking years ago. "Can one remain strong, despite losing physical mobility?”  Though I conceptually knew the answer was yes (some of the strongest & most resilient folks I knew were in wheelchairs or chronically ill), the rationale eluded me.  Introspection was in order!

I noticed that strength had nothing to do with the external, like body fat percentage or muscle mass.  To me, true strength is most fully illuminated in the ways folks get back up after eating shit or making mistakes.  As jazz virtuoso Miles Davis remarked, "if you hit a wrong note, it’s the next note that you play, that determines if it’s good or bad."

This philosophy resonates beyond music, echoing in sports, and all areas of life. Picture running a half marathon, realizing you've veered off your expected pace.  Doubt creeps in.  Your legs feel heavy & breath labored.  Do you stop here, too disappointed to have fallen off track & that you might not meet your race goal?  Do you get consumed by anxious thoughts like “I can’t do this”?  Do you drop all expectations & continue forward, giving it what you have on this current day?  Be it in a jazz solo, a race, or after a tough conversation with your partner, resilience to get back up, demands courage, vulnerability, and inner fortitude. A cocktail of true strength.

So how do you navigate forward after missteps?  Will fear dictate your actions?   You get to choose!

Brene Brown comes to mind here - “I want to be brave with my life. And when we make the choice to dare greatly, we sign up to get our asses kicked. We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can’t have both. Not at the same time. Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome.”